Things About Me That Are True

- I have peed my pants at least 3 times in my adult life.

- Totally sober every time. Seriously.

- I have made adult men uncomfortable with the amount of food I can eat in a sitting.

- I have gotten stuck on the top of an 8ft fence in lacy underwear.

- In front of a boy I had a huge crush on.

- I have worked with the Muscular Dystrophy Association for over 9 years. This is the first year since I was 17 that I didn't go to camp.

- When I first first came to NYC back in 2004 I shared a studio apartment and a queen size bed with my best friend Kate.

- I was once in a promo video for Good Morning America with my friend Meg. The video aired once and was immediately pulled off the air due to "inappropriate dance moves." My legs are too hot for day time television.

- I love brunch, cheeseburgers, and cupcakes. I eat each of these at least once a week. The cupcakes are more like 3 times a week.

- My puppy is named after a hot dog.

- I have gotten locked in my bathroom and had to climb out a second story window in nothing but a towel.

- I once fell down a flight of subway stairs.

- I currently live in a tiny studio apartment in New York City and work for a hedge fund. But my dream job is working as a service coordinator for a non-profit and I secretly want to live in a house with a big porch in a small town.

- I am a romantic and a fan of grand gestures. If you stood outside my window with a boom box playing Peter Gabriel I would be putty in your hands.

Why I Get Out of Bed

One of the best parts of my weekday-day is watching the people run to make the shuttle before the doors close. I mean no one looks cool doing that. Which is nice. We're all on the same playing field when running for the 1 shuttle train. Man with the expensive suit, girl in the leggings wearing her sunglasses underground, me with the unbrushed hair and stuff falling out of her bag.

Last Night's Phone Call

Me: Hello?

Man: Columbus Ohio?

Me: Excuse me?

Man: Columbus Ohio?

Me: Who is this?

Man: We don't talk to people from Columbus Ohio let alone date them.

Me: He isn't a Buckeye! Trust me that's the first thing I verified.

Man: Well ok then.

Me: Ew I would never date a Buckeye. Wait, who is this?

Perfect Timing

Seriously Manhattan? More rain? Is that even possible?
Thank goodness I'm getting out of town.

Good God I Love My Friends

K: Oh god you are ridiculous! He does not look like Chris Farley at all. He's cute! Chase the "chub" girl!

C: Well, obvi I picked better pics than the ones where he has like 6 chins. So keep that in mind.

K: Oh jeez.

C: Let's be real. I'd lick all 6 of his chins.

Man Babies

Jim sent me this link and at first I was all, ew dude that's totally weird. But then I found myself laughing out loud at my desk in my very quiet office.

Enjoy:
Man Babies.

Grumpy

I am in a bad mood. A very bad mood.

I need to go for a run. Or have a drink.

Instead I am watching this: